Priorities

“A Woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her.”

I’ve always thought that was a powerful statement. That in order for any man to find a woman that he should have to seek out God before he can find her. It’s one of those things that I can’t express loud enough to my single friends and daughters. But as incredible as that statement is, it shouldn’t stop there.

It’s easy to see that statement and think about what it looks like before we get married. That in order to find the man we’re supposed to marry that our walk with Jesus should be solid. And it should be. But we married women need that reminder too because that statement should follow us throughout the entirety of our lives. Even once we are married. Because once we’re married we shouldn’t give up on our pursuit of God. He should still be our number one priority. We should be so in love with God that it draws our husbands to Him. We should be so in love with Jesus and spending time with Him that our husbands can’t find us unless they’re sitting with Him too.

It’s easy in marriage to become cynical. It’s even easier to become bitter and resentful after years of unmet expectations and disappointments. It’s easy to cling to hurt and focus on what we don’t have. We women are amazing at doing that! But when we focus on our Creator those things sort of wash away as we take our eyes off our circumstances and look at the One who gave us our spouse to begin with. We can’t go wrong when we’re focused on the right things. Our heart won’t grow cold when our heart is full of love for our Creator.

If you’re struggling in your marriage today, if the love you once shared has run cold and you’re just ready to give up…don’t look in any other direction but up. Go to the source, the One who brought you together to begin with. Focus on God’s love for you and allow Him to place His hand upon your heart and as His love fills you up it will pour out of you and into your spouse. Because the more we pursue God, the more our love and affection for Him trumps all others and the more things in our life will start to make sense leaving us more fulfilled and content.

Those are big words and big steps to take if you haven’t already been living that way. Trust me. I know. It has taken a lot of painstakingly new habits and daily reminders to focus on the things above as a way to remind me to turn my eyes in the direction of the cross. But on the days that I remember to do those things life is different. My day is different. My attitude is different. My heart is different. My reactions are different. The way I love is different.

When we pursue Jesus with all of our heart and allow the Spirit to move within us…everything changes. So be that woman. Be that woman that chases after God so hard that the only way her husband will ever find her is through his own pursuit of God.

The Sideline Shuffle

I came home from work a few months ago to find this little guy in front of our house.  As I walked up, his tiny head turned, and we locked eyes. The second I saw him, my heart hurt. It felt like it was 110 degrees out and the sun was beating down on his little body. I had no idea where he came from. No nest in sight, panic washed over me. Tears filled my eyes. My mama heart took over.

Yes. Yes. I know. It is a bird. But all I could see was this helpless little creature who looked lost and scared.  As I shifted my position to look at him closer, his eyes followed me.  He didn’t look scared.  It is like he wanted me to rescue him. Wherever I moved, his little neck turned. I knew he was young. He still had those sweet soft fluffy feathers. I wondered if he was hungry. I’m sure he was thirsty. I didn’t know what to do. But I knew I couldn’t leave him there.

At this point my husband had joined me to see what I had found. He too looked for a nest of some sort but saw nothing. It was landscaping day so I knew the guys had been through the area with the leaf blower and might have quite possibly blown this little guy right out of his nest.

We decided to walk into the house and watch from the front door to see what might happen next.  And when we moved, he moved. He hopped his little body right toward the front door.  His little mouth was open wide as he began to cry.  I thought I was going to burst into tears. The mama in me couldn’t stand it.

At this point, my husband had begun googling what to do with a lost baby bird and he discovered we had come across a fledgling. This was a not a baby bird in distress, but instead one that was learning its way. The article my husband found suggested that the mother was most likely close by watching her young one, making sure it was okay. But she did so from a distance. I was fascinated. I watched longer as he began to hop and attempt to flap his tiny little wings all while crying out for help.  

As he hopped, he headed for the direction of the bushes and this time when he flapped his wings, he gained a bit of air and landed himself on a branch in the bush. Finally, I felt better and was able to give him the room he needed to do his thing.

Over the course of the last week, I have thought quite a bit about that little fledgling.  How much my heart hurt watching this little bird try to figure out its next move and not knowing what waited ahead for it. It made me think about my children.

Watching your kid struggle is never an easy thing. Especially if they have placed people in their life who add to their struggle.

Four of my five children are adults. They don’t need mom anymore to prepare their meals or do their laundry or keep them safe.  They are on their own and much like that fledging, they are navigating the world around them as I sit in the background and watch from a distance.  I don’t get to pick what they eat, who they choose to allow into their lives or what activities they participate in.  Instead, I watch. I attempt now and again to offer advice or direction when asked, but I know, the only way they will truly figure things out is to let them make mistakes and live out the consequences of those mistakes.

Parenting is hard. But as parents we must know when to let go and allow them to navigate their journey.  And as badly as we want to intervene and overstep, we can’t. Taking a seat on the sidelines and doing what I like to call the Sideline Shuffle all while letting them find their way is the most selfless and loving action we can take. Even when it’s hard.

About 18 years ago, my youngest son became very ill while we were on vacation. He had a very high fever and his breathing had become labored. We found our way to the nearest urgent care where we were told we needed to get him to a hospital.  As I sat in the back seat with my less than a year-old baby, I held him close.  The entire way I prayed.  I thanked God for allowing me to be his mom and that no matter what happened next, I knew my child belonged to God and that He loved my child far more than I could comprehend. I knew God’s plans were greater than my own and that He was in control.  I trusted Him.  But at the same time, I was afraid of what might happen to my little one.  But God.

As parents, we must recognize that our children do not belong to us.  They are His.  He gives them to us for such a short time and our mission is to point them towards truth and to Jesus. To teach them Who should be first in their life. To encourage them to turn from the things of the world that would distract them from following Jesus. To not encourage them to worship idols or material things. We have only been given a few short years before we must push them out of the nest and let them learn to fly. 

Over the last few weeks, I have been able to share this story with a few of my friends who have littles still at home. The wonder and fear that fills their eyes when I say, “those babies don’t belong to you” always makes me smile just a little bit. The moment that realization sinks in becomes a moment that will forever change your perspective and parenting strategy and will forever change the course of not only how you see your children, but the way in which you see your Abba Daddy!

Pushing them out of that nest is a scary move but sending them on their way without Jesus is far scarier. Be confident!  God has them and He loves them!  He’s watching and waiting to catch them! And His love and His provision for their lives is far more than anything we can ever give!

2 Week Notice

One of the hardest concepts for me as a spouse and parent is fighting the temptations of this world to do life (marriage and parenting) the world’s way. I struggle to embrace truth at times because the world is often offended by God’s design and the people pleaser in me wants to make those around me happy. Sadly, I oftentimes do go the way of pleasing others at the expense of being obedient to what I know Truth to be.

Between movies, tv programs and books, the world spends countless amounts of time attempting to paint a picture for us as to what marriage, parenting and family should look like. A portrait that most of the time is far from the way in which God designed any of it to be. The Bible paints a much different picture than the world and throughout my 27 years of married life and 24 years of parenting, I have learned that following God’s design instead of my own or the world’s leads to blessings and joy that this world has yet to offer me.

A few years ago, I listened to a sermon titled Time’s Up (The Summit Church, JD Greear, 11/10/19). I decided I needed the reminder and listened to it again. As the sermon began, I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect but it hit the nail on the head for me and where God is trying to take me as a spouse and parent.

I have spent years praying and asking God to reveal Himself to my children the way in which He has revealed Himself to me throughout the years. I want them to know Him the way I do. To experience the joy of walking in His way and living life by His design instead of what the world would offer. To live the “best life”, a life experiencing the goodness and faithfulness of God and not the life (plan) I want or think they should live. God has purposely designed each of them for a part of His story and I desperately want them to know the joy that comes from walking with Him.

As we listened to the sermon yesterday the pastor talked about a conversation that took place between himself and his mom when he decided to have a conversation with her about what God was doing in his life when he was in college. It was a conversation he was nervous to have because he was afraid she would be disappointed in him.

He began by saying, “Mom, I know this is probably really disappointing. I know you must have had this vision of me living close, making a comfortable living, and raising your grandkids in a place where you could see them every day. But I feel like God wants me to go live overseas where people don’t know about Jesus.”

And here was his mom’s response, “J.D., your father and I have been praying for God’s will for you your whole life. And if this is how God wants to use your life, we won’t stand in your way. There’s nothing that would make us prouder than knowing you gave your life back to God for his service. We’ll have all eternity to enjoy the blessings of our family,” she said. “So, if we miss out on some of them down here, that’s ok. We’ll have all eternity for that. We’ve only got a few years to ensure that people’s sons and daughters around the world have a chance to be included in our family.”

Only one life to live… That’s the legacy JD Greear was given by his parents. And he said it was greater than anything else they could have given to him. THAT is the legacy that I want to give to my children! That is who I want to be for them. I want them to know that the eternal destination of those around them are far more important than anything else. That following Jesus and sharing Him with the world is by far, more significant than a full table on Thanksgiving.

JD Greear followed up his story with this: “So, one simple question for you: What legacy are you leaving? What kingdom are you leveraging your resources for?” He said, “You see, there is one thing we CAN’T do there (eternity in heaven) that we can do here: tell people about Jesus.”

That is the message I want my children and the children I love as my own to hear. That is my heart for them. I LOVE being a wife. I LOVE being a mom. But both for me are completely worthless if both of these titles are all about me and my happiness. I want to leave this earth knowing that my husband and children know/knew that following Jesus and leading others to follow Him were the MOST important things.

As JD Greear said in his message, we have all been given a two weeks notice. The death rate is 100%. We never know when our last day will be so we must live as if that day is today.

Our notice has been given. What are we going to do with it? “In that last day, when Jesus returns, the ONLY thing that will matter is whether we were a faithful steward and used our resources for His purpose.”

#OnlyOneLifeToLive

Quieter

The ongoing script pushed by those continuing to sensationalize a false narrative, is that of misinformation and confusion that the church/believers only care about “winning” the SCOTUS decision and/or only care about the birth/life of a child.

I’m pretty certain I can say this regarding the churches I have previously attended, that the sanctity of life is regularly taught and fought for and that those same churches have taken action to help those in crisis. That single moms have been welcomed and those in financial need have been helped and cared for. This I know personally as I have been taken care of in this way by the churches I have attended. The churches I have attended have supported and participated in helping the local crisis pregnancy centers. Foster care and adoption highly are encouraged, supported and an active ministry within the church (and this is most true for the church I currently attend).

All of this to say, believers have not been sitting idly by for the last 50 years just waiting for a change. No. Many have been actively involved in their communities caring for those who needed care. Are you shocked? Maybe surprised? Of course, you are. Because this isn’t the narrative being spun by the media or those pushing a certain agenda. Like every other hot button topic out there, misinformation is shared, and hatred spread thus creating further division through propaganda and scandal. Sadly, this country falls for it each time it happens. Whether it’s Covid, a shot or now this, we play into the hands of those wanting to divide and conquer. Instead of taking a minute and sitting with a fellow human to truly share in real conversation, we feed into the chaos. The chaos created as a way to further push the real agenda of power, control and money.

Once again I am praying that the bickering, arguing, insults, threats and demeaning stop. That we learn to listen and to see one another as human beings worthy of love and respect. That regardless of your stance, it is just that, your stance and a choice made as an individual whether that involves, Covid, same sex marriage, abortion, religion, you name it. To remember that an individual’s beliefs or opinions have never been swayed by a lack of compassion or by abusive and bullying behavior.

For those who label themselves as a believer or follower of Jesus, the belief’s we hold are based on the Truth of scripture and those Truth’s do not change. However, as I’ve mentioned in another post, an individuals’ beliefs about Truth are determined by one’s personal relationship with the Holy Spirit and each relationship is different so we aren’t always going to land on the same truth.

We need to remember, right and wrong/good and evil still exist and even when the world tries to teach something differently, we must hold to the Truth of God’s word. His word has always called for action not just word.  So, we can share our thoughts on these topics but we need to move! Act! Go, Do and BE to those who do not know Him! We are the hands and feet and though we can speak the Truth, the world is changed when words are put into action.

This world desperately needs Jesus, but they aren’t going to find Him through the hateful or demeaning words on social media or picket signs. We should look and act differently than the world and that cannot happen if we are conformed to its image.

We must remember that the posts, the protests, and the hatred being spread, does not and will not change the Truth of scripture and God’s sovereignty.  We also need to remember that none of this is a battle that we need to win because it has already been won. We know He had the victory and that one day, every single knee will bow, and tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord! So, rejoice in knowing these things! Pray that eyes will continue to be opened to truth, and pray for true repentance in our country. 

In the end, remember to be strong and courageous! We need to love and respect one another! To stand in strength, in love, in humility, in hope, and in joy! One day, these things will pass away and will be made new through Him!

Painted Fences

Words matter. What I might think or call good/beneficial, might be different than what someone else thinks or sees as good. What I believe as bad/sinful may not be bad to another. The banter and disagreements over sensitive topics that many people feel differently yet passionately about is overwhelming. Perspectives based on things such as life experience, spiritual/faith beliefs, or just our own pride, help to shape the way we view the world.

But at the end of the day, we each have the right to decide for ourselves (not everyone else) what our individual belief system will involve. What we in our home may see as good or sinful, may not be how it is seen by others. It does not make you wrong and me right. Instead, it just puts us on opposite sides of the same fence. I may paint my side of the fence blue, while you paint your side red. We’re looking at the same fence just different colors. I’m not going to argue with you to paint your side blue. Even though it is the better color 😉 No. You are free to choose. But your choice will not impact my belief in what I consider as the more beautiful color.

A lot of the issues we see being thrown around are being stirred up by those who do not like that not everyone agrees with their choices, their lifestyle, their attitudes, or words. They want others to agree or be okay with what they are doing or saying or believing. They don’t like thinking that there are people who view certain actions as “evil” or “bad”. So, those who believe their way of thinking is the only way, will then put down and demean anyone who crosses their path and doesn’t agree. It’s interesting to me because many years ago, I was in counseling and listened as the counselor told the other party sitting in the room that they were a smooth-talking person who would take down any individual so as to accomplish their agenda. I often think of that day in counseling as I see this type of personality played out on social media as those individuals work to force their agenda on others no matter the cost.  Anything to accomplish the agenda of painting the fence the color they deem as the correct color. If you are someone who must demean another to get your point across, then maybe there is something not quite upstanding about the statement you are trying to make. What we believe is our personal choice and right but how we display and share that belief should be done with kindness and respect if shared or displayed at all.

Another thought to consider. For those who are called believers or profess to follow Jesus, beliefs and convictions come differently. We start with Jesus. Often in debates, people will bring Him into the argument by saying He has room at the table for everyone. Agreed. I believe He does. But I also know that He turned over the tables in the temple when people did wrong. He didn’t invite them to sit and share a drink. I am then reminded of the woman caught in adultery. He didn’t tell her she was loved and to then go live a happy life. No. He told her to go and sin no more. He accepted her but with a condition. In saying, “Go and sin no more,” He was not speaking of sinless perfection, but he was warning against a return to sinful lifestyle choices. The words He spoke extended mercy yet demanded holiness. He is the perfect balance of “grace and truth”. With His forgiveness comes the expectation that we will not continue in the same path of disobedience and for those who know God’s love, obedience will be the natural course of action. (John 14:15). Unfortunately, that is not the gospel being taught nowadays. It appears instead, we have a teaching that says, “you can sin as you like because God loves you. There are no consequences for sin because love is all we need.” For me, I cannot ascribe to this particular teaching because it goes against what I believe to be true about the bible and the sacrifice Jesus made. But that is between me, and the conviction placed on my heart by the Holy Spirit. That comes from the personal relationship I have with the Holy Spirit and the truths that He reveals to me as part of that relationship. Only He can change that belief in me. Not the arguments of others. Not the put downs. Not the threats or accusations. Only His work in my life will move me to change the paint on my side of the fence should it need changing. That is why beliefs and convictions are different for believers. We each are at a different stage in our walk with the Spirit which means we may not all be on the same page. So, we need to recognize and acknowledge we all are different and act in kindness.  In addition, this world is made up of 7.753 billion people. We are never all going to agree. So that leaves me to ask that you please respect my beliefs as I respect yours. You do not have to agree with what I believe or do, just I as do not have to agree with what you believe or do. We have the right to our individuality. However, though we may differ in those things, I will still choose to love you. Support you. Encourage you. Pray for you. Be your biggest cheerleader. And I can do all those things because you are a human being worthy of respect and love! And that is love!

Empty

Abusers, Bullies, Narcissists, whichever label you choose, we are learning more about them each day and the way in which they affect society. They are individuals who ridicule and demean, amongst other things, those who do not see the world exactly as they do. They treat those that do not walk the line the way in which they see fit as lesser individuals than themselves. They tell those with beliefs and opinions that do not align with their own that “this is the way it is and if you do not see it my way then ____________”. You fill in the blank.

Please understand, should you encounter an individual with this type of attitude and displaying a form of superiority, it is best to just walk away. The words they speak, the thoughts they share are not worth entertaining.

Human beings respect one another and display kindness and compassion regardless of whether they share the same opinions, ideas, or beliefs.  Do not allow the toxicity that slips from the lips of these individuals to infect your heart, mind, and soul. I know that is a hard thing to do, especially when you have a gentle heart, but rest assured, it is in the best interest of everyone to turn away from such things.

Those who speak to others in an abusive manner have lost the right to be heard. So, when you encounter those without kindness, compassion and/or empathy, it is your choice whether to allow them to “pass through” the boundaries you set.

You are valuable. Your thoughts, words and beliefs have purpose and are important. No one has the right to tell you who you are and what you should believe or support. Don’t ever forget that!

Imagine the world if we stopped showing attention to those who cannot engage in a human way?

“Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!“

Romans 12:14-16

Peace over Pride

Being that this world is shouting at me how I should think, believe and live, I took the time to sort through all the noise and reflect on my own beliefs. This is what I discovered.

In a world that celebrates pride and uses the rainbow as a way to promote that pride, a symbol given as a reminder of God’s protection, His faithfulness, and a sign of the covenant between God and man, I cannot and will not celebrate pride or any other sin that cost the life of Jesus. I cannot celebrate something that ultimately leads to destruction. Someone said, “by God’s grace, I strive in the Spirit’s power to put my pride to death and one day, my God will put a full and final end to any pride which remains in me.”  Until that day when I see Him face to face, pride will be an ongoing sin I struggle to overcome but not one I will celebrate.

Believers are told in Deuteronomy 6:5 to “love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength.” This truth is so important that it was repeated by Jesus (Matthew 22:37). We cannot be focused on pride or sin or the things of this world and truly love God. He should be the priority! Joby Martin explains it like this when he says, “when Jesus is preeminent, when He is before all things, He doesn’t make top of the list. He is the paper on which you write the list so that everything in your world points to Him and Him alone!”  That’s the life I want to live and reflect. A life not based on a religion or a doctrine but a life reflective of an intimate relationship with Jesus. A life surrendered to the Holy Spirit that brings life and peace. A life that demonstrates a love for Him that is so great, that there is no need to fill a void in my life with worldly desires or sin. I know I will never be that person completely on this side of heaven because of my sinful nature, but I will, to the best of my ability, run this race as I have been called while pointing those around me to the true prize, a personal relationship with Jesus and to the Truth of His Word and His Grace.

In our home, we will choose to celebrate His grace, His Truth and His love because it is His grace, His Truth and His love that will win in the end! Today I am thankful for a God who is faithful to His promises and who gave the life of His Son for me. His love is the greatest love I know and the only love I need.

He is the paper on which you write the list so that everything in your world points to Him and Him alone!

Tweet

““He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree” (1 Peter 2:24). “He was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities” (Isaiah 53:5). Therefore, “in him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses” (Ephesians 1:7). “Everyone who believes in him receives forgiveness of sins” (Acts 10:43). The cross of Christ declares my depravity, and delivers me from it. The Christian heart is a broken and forgiven heart.

But something else happened when Jesus died. All his people died with him. When we are united to Christ by faith, his death becomes not only the punishment of our sins, but also the death of our sinful nature. Our old, rebellious, selfish, arrogant nature dies. “You have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God” (Colossians 3:3). “So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus” (Romans 6:11).

A new creation comes into being. “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17). Therefore, “put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:24). Being loved by Christ with self-sacrificing love, and dying to our old selfish nature, shapes us into the image of our heavenly Father: “Be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us” (Ephesians 5:1–2).

A new way of disapproving of sin is built into being forgiven, dying to our old nature, and being recreated in Christ. Christians do not stop disapproving of what will destroy people (sin). They start desiring the good of self-destroyers (sinners). Forgiven Christians want others to join them in being forgiven. Hope-filled Christians want others to join them in the hope of glory. Christians rescued at the cost of Christ’s life are willing to sacrifice for the sake of rescuing others.

This includes all others. Our crucified Savior said, “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you” (Luke 6:27–28). The apostle Paul said, “As we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone” (Galatians 6:10). “See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone” (1 Thessalonians 5:15).

This love for all others is rooted in, and formed by, the sacrifice of Christ. His sacrificial servant-heart forms ours. Paul put it like this:

In humility count others more significant than yourselves. . . . Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant . . . to the point of death. (Philippians 2:3–8)

Counting others more significant than ourselves does not mean approving of what they feel or do. It means becoming a servant of their forgiveness, their rescue, their Christ-exalting hope. Christians do not bear ill will toward any. We live for the good of all.”

-John Piper

Proverbs 11:2

Proverbs 8:13

Proverbs 29:23

1 John 2:16

Romans 8:5-8

Hurdles, Skinned Knees and Chaotic Greatness

Place your trust in the Eternal; rely on Him completely;

never depend upon your own ideas and inventions.

Give Him the credit for everything you accomplish,

and He will smooth out and straighten the road that lies ahead.

Proverbs 3:5-6

I haven’t written in a while.  Life has been abnormally busy, but busy in a good way.  Between family, school, church and moving a family of 7 there has been little time to process my thoughts let alone write them out.

My head is full of great stuff.  God is doing such mighty things in our family, I often take a step back and ask, “Is this really my life?”  There are moments when I cannot grasp how far I have come in the last few years, however, I wholeheartedly acknowledge that nothing I have accomplished I did on my own.  I recognize God’s sufficient grace has carried me every step of the way.

I just finished my first semester back in college. I finished with three As and a B.  All of that in the middle of my youngest son’s health issues, the senseless murder of a friend, the starting of a small group in our home each week, working with a ministry team, leading a women’s bible study group and moving.  It has been months of chaotic greatest as God has worked to increase my faith and restore the lost years of joy taken.

I often cannot comprehend the greatness of my God and how His powerful love can encourage us to trudge ahead even in the midst of anguish. 

God’s plans for our family remain a mystery, however, I firmly believe He is preparing us for something and we are ready for the challenge.  I realize as I continue through my classes I am constantly reminded of the way in which He will use my story to encourage and comfort other women who have been hurt the way in which I was.  He has given me a passion for the people I once disliked and trusted least in life; women.  After years of superficial relationships which always ended with broken hearts, He has placed women in my life to love me and for me to love all while teaching the significance of true Christian sisterhood.  I am overwhelmed daily by the opportunities He allows in which I can grow.

His constant confirmation of love and grace pushes me to strive harder in letting go of my inhibitions to trust women and open my heart to those who need Him.

I recognize that without God’s love and the love of my remarkable husband and love of my extraordinary kids, I would not be where I am today.  My greatest fan and encourager, my husband supports me in every way while inspiring me to keep dreaming and reaching for the end goal. He is my heart and my rock and to know this type of support and love in a marriage are something I never dreamed possible.  In the end, his love and our marriage prove God’s goodness when we seek to live a life faithful to Him.

The last few months have presented several large hurdles to overcome and though I’ve stumbled and skinned a few knees, God in His sufficiently perfect grace, has given me the strength, wisdom and insight to overcome those hurdles with immense anticipation of what He has around the corner for us.

Be encouraged!  God’s plans are so much greater than our own!  When we trust Him completely and allow Him to lead, He uses our lives to encourage others and point them to His amazing love!  Keep running!  NO matter how significant those hurdles appear, with Him by your side, they are worth the jump, skinned knees and all!

 

 

 

A Long Dark Tunnel and A Glimmer of Hope

Are you in love with your significant other?  Do they make you feel safe?  Loved?  Cherished? Respected?  Honored? Adored?  If you can answer yes to those questions, count yourself blessed.

 

Marriage is hard.  It takes a lot of work, patience and communication.  But for some, it is not as simple as work, patience and communication.  For some it is a matter of fighting for their life. Fighting to keep their head above water.  Refusing to drown under the weight of a hardened individual.  

 

Are you aware of the consequences a woman faces when she finally musters up the strength to leave an abusive situation?  Many do not so here are a few:

 

1. Fear of retaliation of the abuser by numerous means. These are only a few:

• Emptying of bank account
• Refusal to pay bills
• Threatening to take children away
• Stalking
• Left with no financial way to care for children
• Harassment from abuser
• Destroyed credit issues leaving the victim with no means to purchase a car, rent a home, open a new bank account
• Continued emotional and verbal abuse
• Created alienation of those in victims life

1. Rejection by friends
2. Rejection by family
3. Rejection by church

These are but a few.  Much is involved but be certain of this, it takes great amounts of courage and strength for one to stand and say, “I am valuable and I will not take the abuse any longer” as they leave.

 

It happens every day.  And the majority of women taking this step are doing it without the support of their family, friends, and church family. They are alone, scared and left to fight for the welfare of their children without the proper support and resources.  It is terrifying.

 

Add to the stress of leaving that of lack of support within our judicial system.  Are you aware if you commit a crime that could carry possible jail time in the United States you are given an attorney if you cannot afford one?  Are you aware that a woman who has been a stay at home mom for her children and has no financial means available after leaving an abusive situation is expected to provide for her own attorney? She is allowed to stand before a judge on her own while the abuser who has the necessary and available funds who may even have more than one attorney fights against her.  Our system allows this to take place every day.   Criminals are represented while innocent victims of abuse must fight on their own against those oppressors in their life.

 

It is so unfair and sickening.  The damage being done to the children in our country because of the “rights of a parent” is absurd and disgusting.  My passion is to see it changed.  To do something to change it but it cannot be done alone.

 

Thankfully it begins with babysteps.  God has given me the amazing privilege of working with an incredible ministry.  A ministry that walks alongside women and their babies left stranded and who need help getting back on their feet.  Supporting women crushed by years of abuse with broken wings needing to be healed by God’s love.  We are a team of women who experienced the issues above in a personal way and want to be the hands and feet of Jesus to these broken women.

 

I accept that many will never understand the pain others suffer. I accept that unless some things happen to you personally, it’s hard to acknowledge and understand the hurt it causes to others. Sometimes we need to step back and realize people are hurting. But not only hurting, they are suffering. They need to be rescued. They need the assurance that someone cares and loves them. They need their broken wings healed. They need HOPE. Will you please visit Give Her Wings and consider supporting our April mama?  Whether through prayers or financial support, we need your help. Will you help us in offering a precious mama and her babies hope today?  Will you walk with us as we minister to those who need the love of Jesus poured over them?

 

I ask you to pray about how you can be a part of this great ministry.  What simple things could you give up in order to help a mama and her babies put food on their table, electricity in their home, or even shoes on their feet?

 

*Would you be willing to give up one visit to Starbucks each week and donate that amount monthly?

*Would you be willing to eat out one less time each month and donate that amount?

Please visit GiveHerWings.com and read some of the precious notes from the mama’s who have already been helped through this ministry and read more about what it is we do as well as the heartbreaking story of our April Mama.

 

 

Originally published on For Always.

With Love, The Adulterous Woman

Not many will understand or know the pain of betrayal that leaves deep wounds created by those we’ve loved as they walk away.  

For me, the wounds created began with the title, adulterer.  Stories were told while the people in my life clutched hold of gossip and walked away.  I patiently waited.

Rumors spread like wildfire.  Whispers full of judgement followed by raised eyebrows brought pain that couldn’t be ignored.  I patiently waited.

The screams of the world yelled fight back.  God said, “Be still.”  

My children cried at the cruelty caused by ignorance.  I patiently prayed.  

From court hearings filled with lies to documents full of untruths, the fire grew tall and the smoke suffocatingly thick.  I patiently waited.

Friend you know the pain.  You’ve sat in that same cold courtroom listening to the words of betrayal.  The feelings of darkness from the other side leave you bewildered and questioning your own sanity. You know the dark filled lonely nights full of tears crying out to God for His rescue.  You too have heard Him say, “Be still and wait.”

Waiting.  The hardest part of waiting when you have been trampled, talked about, lied about, and labeled, becomes that of waiting. The longer the wait, the more you begin to believe the lies and you’re left questioning all you’ve done. The longer the wait, you begin to accept the titles. For me, my title became the adulterous woman.  But God.

Through all the name calling and shunning, I found something.  I found a love like no other. In the midst of pain, I became desperate.  A mighty thirst for genuine community and relationship grew deep within my heart.  I wanted to know the love and loyalty of a true friend. I prayed and patiently waited.

Suddenly, a door opened and a glorious light shined into my loneliness.  As He walked through the door, Jesus wiped away every tear and began mending my broken heart.  As He wrapped me in His arms, enormous love and kindness filled His eyes as He said, “You are MINE.”

This man began picking up every piece of my broken heart and meticulously worked them into something new.  As He worked, He spoke to my broken heart.  “You are my beloved child.”  
How had I forgotten?  

For the first time in too many years, my heart began to beat again as the healing words of His truth and love were spoken into my life. His presence and peace overwhelmed me. He cast aside those “names” given by others and replaced the, with “Daughter of The One True King.” 

You see it is easy to be defined by the words of others.  It is easy to fall prey to the attacks of the enemy as he works to discourage and torment leaving us to forget our true identity.  

It is easy to forget that sin is sin.  Gossip, lies and betrayal. No one is without sin and no amount of “good works” makes us any better than another. The enemy points to our sin and calls us failures but Jesus redeems and calls us His own.

So from one sinner to another and who has been redeemed and restored, take the childish playground name calling and untold truths in stride. Don’t allow it to define you.  Remember who you are and to Whom you belong.  He knows every heart and every thought.  He knows what has happened behind closed doors.  He knows every ounce of pain and every tear that has fallen. He will rectify all the wrong that has been done.  He makes all things new because His mercies are new every morning.  

Wait patiently and trust His timing.  Allow Him to fight for you because in the end, I can promise you, He will give back to you all that was taken and so much more. When we walk with Him and choose good over evil, we win! Just have faith my sweet friend ❤

With Love,

Daughter of the One True King

“The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

Exodus 14:14